Cypress Assisted Living Blog

How to Help Your Senior Parent Adjust to Assisted Living

Happy senior couple in their assisted living community

Even though change is inevitable, it is hard to adapt to it. Following this, most people aren’t open to change.

This is extreme in the case of aging adults relocating from their homes to an assisted living community.

Most older people aren’t open to change because they dread isolation and aren’t sure of what to expect in the new environment.

However, some seniors try to embrace change and adapt to the new conditions. They find it fascinating to reside in a new community, pursue hobbies and be socially active.

Either way, the first days or months in the new environment may be challenging for your elderly parents.

Therefore, it is necessary to give your senior parents positive reassurance, encouragement, and support to assist them in adjusting to their current lifestyle.

Practical Tips to Ease the Transition for Your Elderly Parents

1. Stay In Touch With Them

One of the top reasons seniors hesitate to move to an assisted living community is the fear of isolation.

You should visit your senior parents regularly at the facilities to assure them of your support and love. This will reduce their fear of isolation and abandonment.

If you reside in the same area, you can try and visit them frequently. Make the visits a routine. For instance, organize your calendar in a way that will enable you to see them once or twice a week. This way, you will be able to spend quality time with your senior parents.

If you have a tight work schedule, use technology—WhatsApp and Skype are apps to keep the communication going, regardless of your location.

For a smooth transition, accompany your senior parents during and after moving. You can even stay with them for a couple of days during the move-in period—this will help them settle in.

2. Let Them Have Their Say

Relocating to an assisted living community comes with mixed feelings of inadequacy, abandonment, loss of independence and dignity, as well as fear of the unknown.

It’s normal for your seniors to feel isolated and troubled during the first couple of months in the assisted living facility.

Be in touch with your parents during this initial period.

You should be patient and be attentive to what they share: give them a Skype call, even if it’s all negative talk.

Don’t trivialize the situation by uttering things like, ‘it’s only a phase,’ ‘you’re negative, or ‘you’re making it look worse.’ Instead, listen to them and provide solutions that can assist them in adjusting to the new conditions.

Urge them to participate in social events and other activities organized by the assisted living community. Most outstanding facilities provide a variety of activities for older adults and welcome volunteers to aid with communal work.

For instance, many facilities allocate roles to residents—these duties include answering phone calls and managing the library. Social activities improve their well-being and help them adjust to the new life.

Sometimes, during a visit, go with a friend or a former neighbor to help your parents feel loved and lighten the mood.

Strive to keep the lines of communication open. It may take longer than expected for your parents to get accustomed to the facility; you must frequently visit until they get on board, even when you are sure they are getting the best care.

Let your parents express their emotions. It will also give them room and time to adjust to their new living arrangement as it will eventually make them happy.

3. Visit Your Elderly Parents Often

You know your parents better, so you are in the best position to decide on the best assistance that they’ll need.

Many experts recommend that you visit them as often as possible to ensure that they’re well taken care of. The frequent visits can help your parents by significantly reducing stress.

It may be simpler for them to meet new people at events or in the dining room.

However, if your parent is contacting you many times a day, remaining in their room, and waiting for you to show up and keep them company, you may need to give them some space to urge them to branch out.

4. Show Them Empathy

The issue of relocating to an assisted living community is a tricky situation to handle for your loved ones. Be sure to show empathy for your parents and not sympathy. This will give them an impression that you care and any alternative you would have preferred.

Your loved ones have been living independently, caring for others, taking care of a family and home for their whole life.

Moving to an assisted living facility often leaves seniors feeling like they are losing their freedom and becoming dependent on others.

Many seniors are distressed at the prospect of being a “burden” for someone else, and they often feel considerable guilt and a loss of their dignity.

Reassure your parents of their significance to your family. Discuss the things that will remain constant.

Perhaps it’s the monthly card game they play with their grandchildren, the book club they run with pals, or the holiday experiences they’ll share with the family.

These can all integrate as a part of their life in an assisted living setting.

5. Don’t Overprotect Them

Older adults treasure their independence as it gives them a sense of achievement and purpose. Having a sense of purpose is helpful to their self-worth and emotional well-being.

Assisted living facilities usually promote such a lifestyle. They ensure that senior citizens get personalized care while ensuring their privacy and independence remain intact.

Even if you have concerns about how your parents will adjust, do not be overprotective of them.

You can offer care and attention that is reasonable but do not handhold them. Hand holding makes your elderly parents overly dependent on you, making it difficult to adjust to their new environment.

6. Add Some Personalization to their New Home

The surest way to assist your parents in adapting to the new atmosphere is by installing familiar items and souvenirs in their new apartments or suites.

For example, if your loved one loves to have a bible, novels, music records, and family photos, it would be wise to have the same in their new homes.

Discuss with your parents their most-preferred layout and allow them to decide regarding their new apartment decor.

Implement their inputs on the furniture arrangement and the selection of pictures. Also, engage them in setting up the living room.

While you implement all their wishes, ensure that all are safe and attainable before promising to deliver.

Cloning their home will let them feel more at ease and at home in their new surroundings.

7. Get the Staff Involved

The staff at assisted living facilities are well known for taking good care and involving their residents. Most of the time, they go the extra mile to attend to specific entertainment and health needs.

As your elderly parent is settling in their new home, make sure you meet the staff and go over your parents’ needs. Doing this will have incurred that the little things that would make your parent’s life easier are well taken care of.

Whenever you visit your parents at the facility, talk to the staff to know how your parents are adjusting. This will help you work hand in hand with the team to make your parent’s stay at the facility comfortable.

8. Don’t Be the Helicopter Kid

Your parents will take time acclimatizing to the new living environment. If your parent has Alzheimer’s, adjusting to the new environment will be very difficult as they cannot communicate effectively and independently.

However, this doesn’t mean that you should visit your parents daily or check on them constantly.

Give them sufficient time to get to know the facility on their own and adjust. For the transition to an assisted living community to be successful, you have to understand that such a move is indicative of their loss of virility, dignity, and independence for your parents.

Your parent will experience a range of emotions, both positive and negative. This is entirely normal. Allow your parent to process these emotions while still being present and listening.

Remember to tell them they are essential as this goes a long way in promoting a smooth transition and it also maintains and facilitates greater happiness for your parent.

Bottom Line

Your parents took care of you since you were young up to the age of caring for yourself. And now, as they shift to assisted living, it’s your turn to take charge of things: it’s your role to see that the transition is as smooth as possible for them.

The initial days at the assisted living communities are, without a doubt, difficult for most seniors. Fortunately, these tips will help them get started on the right foot and catch up as soon as possible.

Related Questions

1. How Long Does It Take For Seniors to Adjust to an Assisted Living Community?

Experts believe that senior citizens averagely take three to six months to adapt to the assisted living environment fully. However, this may vary from one senior to another.

Shifting to an assisted living facility is a significant step in life, and many people find it very hard to adjust. There are steps that you can adapt to make this life transition a bit comfortable for your parents.

2. Can I Force My Parent Into Assisted Living?

No, you cannot force your parents to move into a nursing home unless they have lost their discernment (that is, they’re experiencing mental issues).

3. How Long Do People Live After Moving to an Assisted Living Facility?

According to a survey co-authored by the American Health Care Association and the National Center for Assisted Living, the average duration of stay for residents in an assisted living facility is around 28 months, with a mean duration of 22 months.

To learn more about Cypress Assisted Living and our senior living homes, please feel free to contact us.